Humanity Is For Everyone

I came here like a refugee. I fought off the government in my country, and I came to this country for more hope. For many years I slept in many parks and streets, 17 or 18 years. Between 2004 and 2014 I was sleeping rough, have no money, only few pounds a week from the Home office for about six months and then started getting food vouchers for 3 years. Many times I told my solicitor I want to work because I can work, please give me permission. I was in my country active. I want to go to work, for economic is good, for everything is good. They just give you one piece of card, write down the reference number and my name and my date of birth, and my one sentence in middle of the card: you are not allowed to go to work.

I think 2014 was the first time I was granted refugee status. But in 2018 my mother wasn’t well. I travelled back to my country and after 6 months my mother died while I was in my country, if I did not go to see my mum, I wouldn’t have forgotten myself. When I came back here in 2019 they took my BRP residency card and revoked my refugee status. I didn’t know I shouldn’t be travelling to my home country while having refugee status. I couldn't read or write English. Nobody explained it to me. And I saw others go to my country and back, no problem. When I came back in 2019, they took my documents.

After that I became homeless again until March 2020. Every two days, three days maybe, I eat something. And the weather was very, very, very cold. I know a lot of people die in the street. One day somebody found me in front of Asylum Welcome. Because the Covid coming, the government said nobody must be in the street. That’s the reason St Mungo’s pick us up, every homeless. They put me in a hostel. I got something to eat and somewhere to sleep. Every single minute there's some fighting, some argument – in the night, in the day, anytime. Is like a zoo. Believe me, like a zoo. Smoking, using drugs, everything. It was horrible. You got one blanket and one plastic mattress. I was there about nine or ten months on the floor. All day drug people and drunk people come in. They don't care about somebody like me. I couldn't sleep at all in the night. Eventually I was moved to Travelodge in Abingdon Road and I stay there about six or seven months, I don't remember exactly. Over there was very good. After that we went to Canterbury House. There the people were very good to me. The staff were kind to me and the manager as well. They always tried to help not just me but everyone. They helped with accommodation, immigration issues, police issues. Any problem they try to sort it out. St Mungo’s, I won’t forget you. They took me and put me in the Travelodge. I say thank you very much. I was very lucky, this time somebody can offer me help and look after me.

When covid restrictions were lifted I had to find another accommodation so I had to choose between two plans, A or B, plan A was to move to a flat if I have status which I didn’t have any ID and no status at that time so this plan was destroyed , and plan B was to share accommodation with somebody else as I do not have status or. We went to plan B with Connection Support helping me. They put me in a shared flat with Enus , he was my neighbor in Canterbury House, and Enus, a Bangladesh guy. He’s good man.

Enus is like me. He came to England 18 years ago. Like me, nobody support him. But he goes to mosque for prayer. People helped him there. I couldn't find nobody to help me the same as Enus. First year somebody helped me, after that, nobody. I had a lot of problems and the result for me every year I’m becoming weaker, weaker and weaker. And now I got a lot of illness – heart problem, diabetes, kidney problem, back problem, leg problem, mental problem. Why these illnesses happened to someone like me? I got Corona from my house mate. I didn't see nobody except Roushin when I got Corona. The food bank gave me food and I made soup for me and Enus. I called the GP at that time, and they told me to take only paracetamol and for 23 days I took paracetamol. After that I went test myself for corona again. They said, Corona gone. When I did first two vaccinations, I was good. My heart was good. After third vaccination, my heart got troubling. One day I feel my heart burning. I saw my doctor and they sent me to hospital. I got tablets for my heart.

At this point, the result of 17 years life in UK come up. I am alone and I’m thinking too much. In the night I couldn't sleep very well. I get nightmare very often. Why I must be at this age, thinking about the suicide. I don't know. Because I am alone thinking too much. I couldn't control myself. I couldn't focus. I am out of the normal life. I forgot my name, many times, when I got the nightmare. I forget many things. We have a saying in my country, Neushtarou Bad azmer saharp, the meaning is that when after somebody dies, you bring him the medicine. Better give the medicine to him before he dies, especially for example if someone's young or has some hope. I had no hope, as I couldn’t see my family 17 years, It’s so difficult. I don't know who made something this immigration rules.

After started getting help from Connection Support in June 2021, this is the first time I felt there is somebody who really cares of me. Connection support paid me £50 a week, plus bus pass for many months. Foodbank was delivered to the flat. Beginning of 2022 I was granted a leave to remain. Roushin helped me to claim Universal Credit, the PIP, unlimited workability and all these benefits were awarded to me. Roushin put me on the Housing Register. And I got this this flat through a housing association, SOHA in 2022. In February 2023 I moved to my own flat. Now I got a flat for myself, I have my own tenancy. Connection Support are helping me with the bills and other pieces and want me to apply for citizenship early 2024. It’s a nice flat. I can relax sitting here, comfortably, and watch TV, or speak with my family. I am happy now. But I am alone in the night, in the day, in any second. This is the first time I lived on my own. I miss my family. I miss my wife. I need them and they need me, especially when atmosphere in Iran is not very well. My wife, my love, I told her: now I can bring you here. I wish one day to be together again with my son, daughter and my wife. Then I can say my life is back to normal, how long I must wait for this to happen? Right now I’m waiting for a year to get this wish to happen, after I get granted a British Citizenship.

I must say thank you to Roushin, for everything she has done for me, because she looks after me like a brother and because of her I started to improve my life. I must be very lucky to get to know here, to be honest with you. My question is that if this support wasn’t with me, what would have happened to me? This weather is cold, 100% I would have died. Because of the accommodation and support I am receiving, I started to remember names, places that I forgot for many years. I saw Roushin more than my wife, more than my children. Roushin for me now like a great person. Because she feels my life and she always helps me. Anything she can do, she did.

When Corona started, everybody kind to each other, because this is crisis for everyone, like now with the Ukraine and Russia. Everyone came together to help Ukraine. This is humanity. Humanity is not for one person. Humanity is for everyone. So I’m talking to the government, please. I know England got Its problems, but you accept me. Accepted someone like me, an asylum seeker. Please help more asylum seekers, to give them life, to give them normal life. Not leave them with nothing. Please give to Connection Support, because if you give help to Connection, they can help more people like me.